I’m going to share my writing style with you, blessed readers. You might realize that you are not alone or you might cower in fear and burn sage that such a monster as me exists.
You see. . .I am a pantser. And by that, I mean I fly by the proverbial seat of my pants when I write. The opposite of pantser is planner and these writers have outlines, character charts, arcs and things I don’t even understand. I’ve mentioned before that most of my scenes and books start from a convo I hear in my head. Don’t worry, I’ve talked to my neuro and she assures me this isn’t mental illness as I realize the voices aren’t real (do I, though?). The conversation seems random and the scene is created as I figure out who is talking, where they are at, what the convo is about and all the other wh-questions. With the exception of the opening scene in Higher Honor the scenes have never been the opening. In fact, the conversation that led to The Disposable isn’t even in the book. The original story was about Simone and Dean, now regaled to book four until Andre started pestering me about his story.
I’ve talked to my neuro and she assures me this isn’t mental illness as I realize the voices aren’t real. . .
But why?????
If you looked at my everyday life, you would find a to-do list, lesson plans for my day job and for my blog. You would assume, correctly, that I function better with structure. Years ago, I hated having days from work because I didn’t handle unstructured time well at all. I actually still don’t. But, the chaos of a pantser is familiar and I’m comfortable with it. I’ve tried outlines and using the fancy words like character arc, inciting event, turning point and suddenly writing feels like a school assignment and the joy is strangled. No offense to you planners, though. I actually admire your efficiency.
The downside. . .
The downside to being a pantser is I eventually have to organize. I probably have 150 scenes written in The Reclaimed that I have to piece together into a loose manuscript. Side note: Those 150 scenes probably contain repeat scenes-those written but forgotten and rewritten multiple times. While grouping them together, I realized I had four scenes of Rax and Andre in the bathroom talking about drugs while someone brushed their teeth.
I also realized that while I liked the first six scenes and the last 12 scenes, I had very little in the middle, just some scenes I really liked, so my life now is writing the middle. A planner would never have this problem as they have their outline and write in order.
My solution. . .
Not gonna lie, the last two weeks have been rough as I tap into my neglected planner side. Staring at a screen filled with badly named files anxiety crushed me. You see, in my haste to write, I had files in my personal drive, computer, Google docs, Word. So, I had to consolidate. I choose Google docs (because I don’t feel like renewing Word). I also used the Milanote app, which I love! It helps me get things in order and I can insert ideas for needed scenes, add pictures to the board.
After a few hours of grief and swearing I’ll become a planner, I get it in order. This is when the convos should fill in the blanks, right? Ha, I wish. Usually, the convos start on a totally different story. . . And my neuro says they aren’t real, LOL!